Just like modern parents they prefer open and honest communication with them childrenthere are still some conversations that will always be challenging.
But according to Dr. Meghan Martinand children’s an ER doctor and mom of four with a massive social media following that makes those awkward conversations a little more fluid, it comes down to location, location, location.
“These uncomfortable but really important conversations you have to have with your kids. The birds and the bees, conservation, drugs, all these things: have these conversations in the car,” he says in a clip posted on his TikTok.
Martin said this “brilliant” insight, given to her by her best friend, handle @teawiththeteach, is the “best parenting advice” she’s ever received.
Here’s why.
“You have your hands on the wheel, you’re looking straight ahead, you don’t have to make eye contact with anybody who’s talking about the birds and the bees and the parts and the drugs or whatever the conversation is about that day. You also have a captive audience that is literally strapped in behind you,” she explained.
Not having to maintain intense eye contact makes the whole conversation less awkward and vulnerable for everyone involved. And where there is less embarrassment, there is more room for things to really be heard.
Plus, unlike talking at home, which already has serious undertones, cars are instantly more casual, so things aren’t as “big of a deal,” Martin noted. Think, wouldn’t it be nice to immediately play an upbeat playlist after one of these chats…rather than sit in awkward silence?
Martin herself has tried this approach with her two older children and says the car has now become a “safe place” for things to talk about. They even bring their own questions for discussion.
“I’m starting to have these conversations with my younger kids,” she concluded, “and I want to emphasize how important it is to talk about these issues early so that when you get to the older teens/pre-teens, it’s not the first time you’ve talked about it hears.”
Martin is also not the only one who has tried car talk. Many people in the comments shared how they successfully brought up difficult topics on car trips.
“Yes, my oldest is 26 and I still have big conversations with him in the car. At that age I wait until we’re on the freeway so he can’t jump out,” one person wrote.
“I love the car for tough conversations with my husband too,” added another.
Several of them recalled having their own difficult conversations in the car as children.
“My mum has ALWAYS done this,” said one viewer, adding: “I still get anxious in the car thinking about what she’s going to raise and I’ve got my own family now. … I’m glad she did and that she cared enough to have these conversations.”
Another parent even shared how they added an extra element to facilitate the discussion, writing, “I did it. Add an ice cream cone to pull together something nice for the brain. My boys would ask for ice cream when they had something serious to discuss.
Other sources they thought about other factors that facilitate conversation in the car, such as close proximity, limited distractions, and changing scenery to help create a sense of not being stuck on a problem. Article published in Signs of life he also believes that a shared goal and orientation in the same direction also play a big role.
Having big conversations with kids can be difficult, but it’s all part and parcel of parenting. Hopefully this tidbit will make things easier for everyone involved.
Don’t forget to have this upbeat playlist ready!